Early parenthood often pitches you into the arena of complicated challenges. At this stage, your toddler exhibits an interest in everything around him/her. This could be anything from trying to taste stuff lying on the floor to depicting an increased urge to escape proper bedtime. When confronted with protests, shrieks and tantrums are common occurrences. This is what some people call aggressive behaviour in toddlers. There is absolutely nothing to dread! It is just your child pleading to mommy or daddy to listen to them! But at times, these outbursts of emotions become unmanageable and repeated attempts to calm down fail miserably. While this could be frustrating, it is a normal part of growing up. There is nothing wrong with your child. What you need to do is to understand the root cause of these problems and better address them.
So, how to control aggressive behaviour in your toddler? In this blog, we will explore some of the proven strategies to address the problem of toddler aggression.
Is it Normal for a Kid to Get Angry?
Absolutely yes! Kids usually get angry when frustration builds up in them. This, along with limited communication skills, leads to violent outbursts and tantrums. This can happen anytime, so prepare yourself to deal with such things whenever you are with your kids. For example, your toddler spots his/her favourite toy that is way above your budget. When you refuse to buy him/her that toy, he/she can start throwing tantrums, kicking and screaming, and gathering a crowd around. In another instance, a friend of your kid is playing with a toy, and instead of waiting for his/her turn, your kid pushes him out of the way and starts playing with the toy. This is an early sign of an aggressive personality and must be addressed at all costs. Teach your kid discipline and the art of problem-solving. The problem previously encountered could have been easily solved if your kid requested, “Can I play with it?” instead of resorting to violence.
Such instances of toddler aggression need to be mitigated by addressing the flaws before they turn into habits. The art of communicating one’s feelings can be difficult at first, but good parenting and guidance can help your toddler ace it. Once he/she has mastered this art, you can expect the instances of violent outbursts to go down.
Different Ways to Handle Anger Issues in Your Child
While aggressive behaviour is normal in toddlers, it is definitely not acceptable. Here are some strategies on how to control aggressive behaviour in toddlers:
- Be a role model for your kiddo: Children learn from their adults. Ensure that your home environment is calm and quiet; your kid will soon pick up that quality. When faced with your child’s tantrum, stay calm and collected. Take deep breaths and speak in a gentle, soothing voice. Show them love, kindness and care while trying to address their issues. Never revert with aggressive words and punishments to calm them down.
- Show empathy: If you have to deny, don’t make it a “your way or the highway” situation! Instead of saying, “No” or “Because I said so, “you can reply with kindness, acknowledging their feelings. You can say things like, “I see that you are sad, but you can’t always have the things you want.” This shows empathy and helps your child feel understood.
- Teach them to express their feelings: Help your child identify their emotions. Teach them to use simple words like “happy,” “sad,” “angry,” or “hurt” to convey their feelings. Addressing their inner self will help your kiddo better address their problems with an open mind.
- Set some ground rules: You must make clear what is expected of them and how they should behave. Teach them what is acceptable behaviour and what is not expected of them. Every unacceptable behaviour must have some consequence like “no TV for the weekend” or something similar down the line. However, strictly avoid physical beatings.
- Practice meditation: Meditation is the perfect tool to calm down a disturbed mind. Practicing meditation from an early age can have excellent effects, including improvement of focus. This will help your child to excel in all fields. Apart from meditation, you can teach your toddler some deep breathing exercises or count from one to ten whenever they get angry. Regular practice can better help them address their anger issues without your help.
- Investigate and address the actual problem: Many times, toddler tantrums might be the outcome, while the actual cause could be something else. Things like sleep disturbance, hunger, or parental separation anxiety could be the trigger. You must identify these problems and quickly find a solution to end the tantrums.
Raising a toddler is a beautiful journey filled with milestones and moments of pure joy. However, navigating their emotional outbursts and aggressive behaviour can be a challenge. No matter how challenging they are to suppress, these outbursts are a part of growing up. There is absolutely nothing wrong with your kid. All you need to do is to apply effective strategies to address these issues.
There could be many approaches, but what matters is whether you can fulfil the end goal, which is to pacify your toddler. It is not an easy task, and you will require a lot of patience. So yes, be patient and don’t lose your cool; that will make matters worse. You can use the suggestions of these blogs to improvise your methods or use a completely different approach. Whatever your method is, strictly avoid aggressive punishments. Always remember that oppression creates resistance.
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